My Groupon Computer is now out of its box and fully charged. It is beautiful. When I ordered it, the description said ‘Scratch and Dent.’ I don’t believe it.
Whatever plastic surgeon fixed this MacBook Air to its current flawless condition, please contact me. I would like you to restore me like you did this MacBook Air. I would like a Post-Divorce-Mommy Makeover. I would like it to include: getting rid of my Smile Lines (whatever, they are wrinkles), give me a Thigh Gap (not sure what that is, but I hear they are pretty popular), lift my boobs up to my chin (I breastfed twins with them…gross!), and make my fingers not look like sausages. When I marry my next husband I want my hands to look like that of the Jergen’s Lotion model on t.v., not like Little Smokies, which is what they look like now.
One day I will be married again. When that day comes, I don’t want to be referred to as the ‘Scratch and Dent’ wife, or even worse…refurbished. Unless of course I end up looking as sleek, and elegant as this Groupon MacBook Air. Then I am okay with it. Because this thing is PERFECT!
Now I better learn how to use this Groupon Computer. Margaret wants me to write an About Me post.